People are as Happy as They Make Up Their Minds to be

“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” - Abraham Lincoln

The other day I was presented with the question, what does it make you most upset that people don't know or understand?

I knew my answer immediately: happiness.

It's important to stop every once in a while and remember what's important to us, what makes us happy. It can be easy to get caught up in the "end game". Whether it's college, graduate school, getting a job, getting married or having kids, there will always be something to work towards. Focusing so much on that end goal can sometimes lead to a fast paced life filled with stress and worry. In reality, the important thing in life is to be happy, not to reach that goal. Because guess what? Once you get into college or get married or whatever it may be, there will be something else. And then something else. So while that step in life may seem like the most important thing in the world and there's no time to do anything else except focus on that, remember, it's not the end of the world if it's not done "on time". Breathe. Be thankful for what and who you have in life. 

I spent most of high school racing to get to this incredible, magical place we call college. And now that I'm 18, about to graduate and move half way across the country, I wish I had stopped to appreciate what I had right in front of me. Friday night football games, having dinner with my family, school dances, seeing my friends every day at school. All of it seemed so ordinary until now. Now that it's being taken away from me, I want it back (of course). 

So today I vow to be present, to be aware. I vow to be happy.

Vowing to be happy doesn't make you happy though... or does it? According to the Facial Feedback Hypothesis, simply forcing yourself to smile can make you happier. Many psychologists agree that smiling can intensify the emotion of happiness, and some go as far as to claim that people can become happy by forcing themselves to smile.

So force a smile if you have to, it'll make life more enjoyable.

Mainstream Beauty- Guest Blog

This week I posted a guest blog on my friend Zoe's blog Picture Perfect! Check out my post  here and check out her full blog here!!

The Fear That Your Past is Your Best

"The fear that your past is your best" - Robbie Coltrane

I'm not exactly sure when, but one day my 50 year old father traded in his life of being a hard working business man for the life of a 22 year old frat boy. Now let me make something clear...he doesn't actually think he's 22. He still goes to work (sometimes) and does other adult things. Now he just does them like a teenage boy would. Let me give you a few examples. He plays a game with the water company and doesn't pay the bill until they shut the water off and show up at our door demanding a payment...just for fun, the hallway upstairs is now a sea of laundry, there is nothing but beer in the fridge, he bought a "guard" dog and he has a new obsession with guns. 


I recently had surgery and stayed at my moms for a few months, leaving my 14 year old brother and dad by themselves. This is when the transformation happened. All they do now is watch movies and play video games in their underwear. Although it's not a pretty sight to see, it's nothing I can't handle.


Sigmund Freud once said, "If there are quarrels between the parents or if their marriage is unhappy, the ground will be prepared in their children for the severest predisposition to neurotic illness". My parents have been divorced for nine years, and from my point of view, Freud had it all backward. I thought turmoil and divorce has clearly sent my dad into a downward spiral of insanity, not me. My mom and I automatically assumed this behavior was a result of the current (and unusual) lack of women in my father's life. As usual, we were sure everything was about us, but as I did some research I realized this wasn't the case at all.


It turns out my dad is a part of a group classified at "middle age". These so called middle age people are in "a period of adjustment between the potentialities of the past and the limitations of the future. An emotional rebellion has been observed in some persons, sometimes referred to as a mid-life crisis".  So while my mom and I have been attributing this childish behavior to the divorce and my lack of presence in his life, it really doesn't have much to do with us at all. He's just another dad wishing he was a kid again.

Seeing is Not Always Believing

Seeing is not always believing- Martin Luther King Jr.

Can we believe what we can't see? Sigmund Freud, an early psychologist largely disregarded by today's scientifically driven psychologists, sure did. Most of Freud's findings had no scientific evidence, yet his concepts were and still are widely accepted. One might not think to challenge the existence of the Id, Ego and Superego, but they can't really be proven to exist either. Besides his focus on the sexual energy of children in the psychosexual stages (many psychologists believe Freud was wrong about children being driven by sexual energy as well), I haven't come across many of Freud's ideas that strike me as completely illogical. This is why I was surprised about how uncomfortable psychoanalytic literary criticism makes me. 

A few days ago in English, we discussed the psychoanalytic lens pertaining to Hamlet. We discovered that the Psychoanalytic theory is based off of a few of Freud's ideas: 

The Unconscious Mind

Id, Ego, Superego

Psychosexual Stages

Repression

and The Oedipus Complex

According to the Psychoanalytic theory, the Oedipus Complex can be seen in Hamlet. The Oedipus complex is a fixation (a result of unresolved conflict in a particular stage) that can occur in the phallic stage of psychosexual development. Basically it results in a feeling of wanting to kill dad and be with mom. When Hamlet was young, his father was killed, and therefore part of his Oedipus complex was fulfilled. The problem was that his uncle Claudius married his mom, carrying out the rest of this "fantasy" for him. When Hamlet needs to kill his uncle and avenge his father, he delays because he feels somehow connected to his uncle for carrying out his unconscious desire to marry his mother. 

Now there are two things to take into consideration. The first is that Freud came after Shakespeare's time. He claims that this complex is found in most human men, but did their culture create this complex, or is it a biological function? Could it even have existed in Shakespeare's time? Many seem to think the time period is irrelevant, but I still believe it must be considered. The second problem I see with this evaluation of Hamlet is that none of this can be proved. The repressed feelings and motivation for killing his uncle are being extrapolated by the reader. Shakespeare never says Hamlet's journey is a result of the Oedipus complex. Can we believe what we cannot see? 

Since the idea of an unconscious mind does not bother me, and that cannot be seen or proven, I was surprised to find that an interpretation of Hamlet that is based off of an idea that cannot be proven from the text itself did bother me. I can't say I would completely disregard the Psychoanalytic literary theory, but I don't see myself using this very often in the future.

The Moment a Little Boy is Concerned With Which is a Jay and Which is a Sparrow, He Can No Longer See the Birds or Hear Them Sing

“The moment a little boy is concerned with which is a jay and which is a sparrow, he can no longer see the birds or hear them sing.” -Eric Berne

Discrimination is an unfortunate reality in today's world, and it truly blinds each and every one of us. Some may think that we treat each other equally, but others are painfully aware that the opposite is true.  I recently took a test though Harvard University's Project Implicit. This webiste provides Implicit Association Tests , free for anybody to take. The test proved to me that no matter how many times I say I don't discriminate, and no matter how much I believe in equal rights, I still have automatic associations. 

I chose to take the Weight Implicit Associations Test to see what would happen. I was instructed to do a number of tasks, as quickly as possible.

At the end of the test, I saw that it was harder for me to associate good with fat than good with thin... and I wasn't the only one. 70% of people naturally associated good with thin, 19% had no preference and only 12% associated good with fat. 






There are many more Implicit Association tests covering topics such as....

Gender-Career
Gender-Science
Age
Weapons
Race 
Sexuality
Skin Tone
Disability
and More


The point of these tests is not to shame the person, but rather to make that person self-aware of his or her natural or automatic associations. The more self-aware someone is, the more likely they are to change their behavior. This is the beginning to ending discrimination. Discrimination of all types exist all around the world. America is known as the land of the free, but are we free? Free to express ourselves and our beliefs without being judged? Not always. A common example of oppression in the United States is gay marriage. Homosexual men and women are often shamed and excluded from society because of their sexual orientation. In many states, they are not even allowed to get married. Another example of discrimination is the unwarranted fear instilled in American people of Middle Eastern men and/or women. Americans commonly associate Middle Easterners with terrorists. It has been a major problem that skyrocketed after 9/11 and one that America continues to struggle with today. I am by no means saying that every American is homophobic or prejudiced against Middle Easterners. I am however pointing out that as humans, we tend to lean towards either one group or another. Rarely do we show no preference to any group of people. There will always be associations that we have, but it is our duty to continue fighting for equality, because many will attest that we have not reached it yet. 

Knowing Others is Intelligence; Knowing Yourself is True Wisdom

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength, mastering yourself is true power" - Lao-Tzu

Yesterday in English class, we talked about our own "shadows". My teacher explained that when we were young children, our parents most likely told us encouraging things like "You're so much calmer than other children. You're the best." or "You're so much more outgoing that the other children. You're the best". These adjectives are opposites. So while the calm child is rewarded for being calm, they are also being told not to be outgoing. While the outgoing child is rewarded for being outgoing, he or she is also being told not to be calm. These things that "we are not" become our shadows. Our feelings towards people that represent our shadows fall into one of two categories, both of which are intense. You either find yourself being incredible bothered and annoyed by these people, or you fall in love with them. Remember, opposites attract! In class we were asked to make a T-Chart of what we are and what we are not. Below is my chart.

    I am                                                I am not
__________________________________________

                                                                                 

* strong                                        *weak

* rule-follower                                *funny

*clumsy                                        *focused

* smart                                         *outgoing

*forgetful                                       *productive

*stubborn                                     *a quitter

*quiet                                           *wild

*determined                                  *troublemaker

                                                                       

                                                                           

                                                                              

After class, I decided to take a personality test to see how well it matches up with the list I made. The results from this test told me I had the personality type ISTJ. All personality types fit into four 'temperments'. I was classified as a Guardian, and more specifically, an Inspector. An Inspector in a nutshell is superdependable, responsible, patient, dedicated, quiet, are most likely involved in community service, and follow the rules. As I read the description of an Inspector, it mentioned that because these people follow the rules, they are often musjudged as "having ice in thier veins" or "being hard-hearted". I couldn't stop laughing as I read this because my dad is always saying I'm cold-hearted. Most of the description was amazingly similar to the list I developed in class. Keep in mind that I had about 5 minutes to compile this list. While I seem to know myself pretty well, I still find it's helpful to read a description about yourself. Some personality traits seemed annoying as I read about them, and now I realize that other people that have a different personality than me might think so too. I encourage everyone to take this  test and find out more about themselves. Improving your understanding of yourself can help you maintain the relationships you have and your relationship with yourself.

A Trap is Only a Trap If You Don't Know About It

“A trap is only a trap if you don't know about it. If you know about it, it's a challenge" -China Miêville

Why do we do what we do? Do the poorest countries in the world choose to be trapped in a continuous struggle of internal conflict? Recently, I've been reading The Bottom Billion by Paul Collier. It focuses on the poorest countries on the planet and explores their past and present economic and political situations. Each of these counties has fallen into one of four traps that keeps them in an endless cycle of internal struggles. These countries fell victim to a certain set of circumstances and cannot seem to find a way out. Conflict, natural resources, bad governance and being landlocked are the four traps identified by Collier. I'm going to explore how Russia does, or does not, fall into these traps. 

The Conflict Trap

The Russia-Georgia conflict, the 1st and 2nd Chechen Wars, and the current conflict in Syria are on the list of major conflicts Russia has been involved in since it's establishment in 1991. Russia has generally remained strong internally, and has avoided civil war since branching off from the USSR. Not one of these major conflicts, nor any others, have caused Russia to collapse economically and fall into the Conflict Trap. 

The Natural Resource Trap

Some people that natural resources automatically means wealth. Natural resources can be profitable if used correctly, but if a country has an abundance of natural resources and fails to manage them effectively, they can fall into the natural resource trap. Some countries fight about resources within their own country, while others can't figure out how to export and distribute them effectively. Russia is rich in oil, gas, coal, and timber. Most of these resources are located in remote areas that are difficult to reach, but Russia has managed to extract them and remain a leading producer and exporter of minerals, gold and fuel. In 2010, Russia exported $376.7 billion worth of natural resources and imported $191.8 billion. Being such a strong exporter in the world economy, it would be hard to imagine Russia falling victim to the Natural Resource Trap explained by Collier. 


The Bad Governance Trap


Collier makes the claim that countries that have bad governance can grow and maintain reasonable economic policies, like Bangladesh, the most corrupt country in the world. Bad governance can also cause a crash an economy in the blink of an eye. Still, it's important to note that having a good government can only do so much. The economic growth rate plateaus around 10%, no matter how good your government is. For bad governance to drag the nation into the bottom billion, it needs "qualifiers". Bad governance alone will most likely not cause a country to fall into a continuous cycle of struggle. 

Russia, no matter how bad it's government is, does not meet these other qualifications. Russia has a population of 142,517,670 and became independent of the USSR when the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991. Russia's education system is ranked 20th in the recent ranking published by the Economist and has produced nearly 100% literacy. Its per capita GDP is $17,000. The variables that keep a country from falling into the Bad Governance trap include a large population, high income, and a greater proportion of people with a substantial education. Judging by the statistics, Russia probably won't be falling into this trap anytime soon. 


The Landlocked Trap

Being surrounded by poor neighbors can be detrimental to a country's international trade and growth. Being as large as it is, Russia has many neighbors. Some of these neighbors include Kazakhstan, Georgia, Ukraine, Belarus, and Finland. None of these neighbors have had enough of an economic impact on Russia to cause an economic collapse or any significant impact on trade. Like i mentioned in the Natural Resource Trap, Russia is one of the world's largest exporters. 

While Russia may be gradually falling into other traps not explained by Collier in the Bottom Billion, it has managed steered clear of these four major traps. Russia is a strong nation internally and has healthy international relationships. For now, the Russians are optimistic about their future as a successful country. The countries that have found themselves in the bottom billion have most likely developed learned helplessness, and will need help seeing a way out. So does this mean they're choosing to stay in the Bottom Billion? I believe they are truly trapped and will need help unlearning this helplessness some of these poor countries have developed.